Sasuke's Teen Boy Innocence
by mericleworker
Summary: Sasuke got a text from his crush, Hinata, and isn't sure how to respond... Just a light humor fic, based on something everyone can relate to, lol. SasuHina. Rated T for mildly suggestive themes.


**Story: Sasuke's Teen Boy Innocence  
>By: mericleworker<br>Rated: T**

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><p>(Sasuke's POV)<p>

The other night I received a random text message from the hot girl I've had a major crush on for years, but I'd never thought she'd notice me. Her eyes always seemed to be resting on a certain, unworthy _dobe_.

She simply wrote: _"Just so you know, I think you're a very cute boy. That is all."_

Of course, since I wake up every morning and check my phone hoping this kind of thing will actually happen to me, I respond by panicking, writing 17 drafts ranging from single words to whole thoughts to 2-3 paragraph treatises on love in the postmodern world, and then just passing out in a bowl of soggy Honeycombs.

All my life I'd secretly carried a liking for this girl. She carried a delicate, yet poised persona. Timid, but secretly absolutely gorgeous in every way. Perfect body, erotic and beautiful all at once. Yet, she wasn't whiny and bitchy like all so many of the girls that sought after me. She was selfless and caring. But harshly and brutally dedicated to the one she loved, and the one she loved only.

Hinata will always love that stupid dobe, or at least, that's what everyone thought. Just as that same dobe will always love Sakura, and just as Sakura will always love me. Little did anyone know, my eyes were always following wherever she stepped, always noticing her hopeful stare at that worthless and oblivious moron. But I was also always hoping she'd turn around just for one moment to share a glimpse with me.

Naturally, I'm surprised by this text. I mean, it's practically come out of nowhere! It's throwing me off balance – I was sure my love would be unrequited forever! Maybe I still have a chance with her… But what to send back…?

So as a beginner at this whole "not-being-unrequited" status, well, thinger… I'm not entirely sure how to react. Oh, how my mob of fan girls would laugh at me now; this is certainly a side of their Sasuke-kun that they've never seen before… Give it to Hinata to put me in a state like this. She's always been unknowingly the most dangerous weapon against me. My weakest link.

I'm not entirely sure of precedent (should I say "thank you" or move straight to which body part I want her lips on), and also not entirely sure which version of myself I should present in a tricky situation such as this (do I pretend to be coy, like some innocent gentleman who'd rather go about things the old-fashioned way, or do I play up my inner frat boy and just talk about her tits).

So here's what I tried, each with successive second-guesses, rewrites, frustrated deletes, and more nervous Honeycomb munching.

Response #1: _You're cute, too. What are we going to do about that?_

Why I deleted it? Because it sounds like she's spilled milk. And as punishment, I'm going to sexually harass her.

Response #2: _So sweet of you to say :) How's things?_

Why not? UGH. Am I a man, or a MAN?

Response #3: _I've been staring at your photos from the beach all summer, wondering what you'd look like naked, surrendering yourself to me on a sandy knoll._

Why not? While I am a man, I'm not a man who gets photos of himself put up when he moves into the neighborhood.

Response #4_: Judging that you sent this at 4 a.m., I'm guessing you're either drunk, high, or someone has snuck onto your phone._

Why not? Much too honest. And where's the gain? I'd rather be an overeager pocket-rocket than a reductive, humorless middle manager.

Response #5: _That's funny because I always thought _I_ would be the one sending you late-night texts disclosing how cute _you_ were._

The problem: It reveals that I've been harboring unrequited pervy thoughts about her. This, in turn, also reveals that I'm not aggressive enough. And that's what _Men's Health_ magazine says women want. Savage opportunist. But I stuck with it because, as I said, my Honeycomb had gone soggy, and in the realm of male desires, food sadly takes precedent over convoluted sexual fulfillment. By the time she received my message, either the moment had passed or she had sobered up. Nothing came back. I think I should've gone with a line about making her body go limp with pleasure or whatever.

-Fin-

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><p><strong>AN: Am I the only person that thinks Sasuke's _way_ cuter this way? Sure, he's a little bit out of character, but nervous guys are so much better!~ XD ...And the fact that Hinata never even got his text even though he worked so hard on it... I based that off of my own sad life T.T, but still, I think that's something everyone should be able to relate to, haha. **

**Review if you liked it, too!**


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